After being homeless for a few months, I met an important character. I called him Chalupa. Chalupa was there for me. He gave me a place to stay. He gave me a family to have. He gave me a reason to live.     Chalupa was someone who took into his temporary home (a house like hotel), gay people from the streets who got along well with him and his partner. I got along great there. So I was welcome to stay there with them.      Might I mention that Chalupa smoked meth too. So I found somewhere that felt long term, and that can help maintain my high. With good company. Chalupa was amazing to me. He became such an important friend to me, that I felt love for him like you would a family member. I had thrown away my family to chase my high instead. Here I get a place to belong and call home, fresh from the streets, so I was extremely grateful for this in ways that I tried my best to help with as much as possible.     See, I wasn't just...

      I started using crystal meth when I still worked as a manager at a outbound sales call center. I remember this only because I remember telling my co-manager that I tried using crystal meth. I don't really know what compelled me to tell her this detail, must have been still high that Monday morning.      I worked for this call center for over a year. One of the longest time at a job that I have. But I eventually quit to peruse another option for employment. I decided to interview for a server position at a brand new, opening soon, On The Border. This On The Border was right across the street from Disney Springs, In Orlando. I was newly single. And now, Newly employed.      Also, I ended up picking up a second job, at another Mexican themed restaurant. PR's Taco Palace was in near the Downtown area of Orlando. It wasn't much of an issue with getting to and from work daily. When I had my car that is. It wasn't until losing my car did ...

      I started to frequent a nightclub called Southern Nights. I first started going here after my ex and I broke up. Months before I even tried crystal meth. I started to become a regular. I became close friends with some of the performers. I started to feel included into a group. It felt nice. I found my new crowd and a place for me to flourish.     Southern Nights is a gay club in Orlando. It was where the I spent nearly every Tuesday. Twisted Tuesday. They had unlimited drinks for like fifteen dollars or something like that. On Tuesdays they also had talent shows. Every week, 8 people completed to get into the finals and win a year long spot on the house cast of performers. I was friends with the current reigning winner, this was the year 2018.         I spent the holidays here too. Like Halloween. A few of my friends from work at On The Border went with me on Halloween. I got this wicked Inspector Gadget costume that tried to keep ...

      On December 26th, 2018, I officially became homeless. I got all my belongings packed up in a storage unit. This won't be my last interaction with Storage Units. But it is my last interaction with THIS storage unit. Remember, by this point, I have lost my car, and now my home, and job was next. Needless to say, I didn't ever pay my storage fees, I after a few months, I lost everything.      I found myself wandering the streets, This part of my life is still really fuzzy. I don't remember much.    I remember telling my mom that I was using crystal meth. She offered to give me a place to stay on her couch again, which is where I stayed when I first moved to Orlando a few years earlier. What I had to do was quit doing the drugs though and get a job. I wasn't ready to get sober yet. I was still enjoying getting high. So I only stayed at my moms with many of my younger siblings for two days. I chose to be homeless instead of sobriety.   ...

      Now, most of you know of Zoom by now, due to its indoctrination into society due to the Covid-19 Pandemic. Some might even know that it was around years before that ever even happened. And even less know that there was "An Underground World of Meth", hidden in Ring Central... another Zoom more or less.      I was first introduced to this world via a random Grindr PnP hookup. I remember this a lot better than I remember most of the big things I write about here because "The Zoomerverse", aka that underground world of meth on Zoom, became one of the most consuming thing that happened while in active addiction. More on that detail throughout the rest of this entire story.      So there I am with this guy, While we are just chilling and smoking,  not long after I arrived at his place at all, he asks me if I have ever partied on Zoom or Ring Central. I had NO IDEA what he meant. He told me all about this community on Zoom (temporality o...

Today, I'm going to write about how I am doing today. In the present. Not the past. Nor the future. But right now.     I needed to take a break from my itinerary of writing topics. Reliving everything that I have gone through, In such graphic details, takes a tole on you. On me. I'll keep it on the "I".      I looked at todays topic, and got immediately overwhelmed. Flushed with such bad memories.      I'm having even difficulty writing this.     How much of my story do I not include?     How much of my story do I INCLUDE? What a conundrum.      I think I'm going to leave this at this for now. Maybe a small break is what is needed. Let me process this. 

      The time period when I lost my car was when I lived in an apartment with a retired marine. He was one of the nicest people I have ever met. I was in the middle of my early addiction phase of life though. So I didn't appreciate him and his personality. I sat there, well stood there, cuz every time we talked it was while standing in the kitchen. That is where we stood when he first was interviewing me to move in. Of course I was high and a ball full of nonsense and energy.      I was looking for somewhere cheaper to live because I had started spending more money on crystal meth. Didn't pay for a month at my current house I was living at. When he told me 500 dollars a month, I jumped at it. Moved out of the house in East Orlando, into this apartment back in West Orlando, not far from where I lived when my addiction started a year and a half earlier.      When I first moved in with the veteran, I still had my car. I had my car fo...

      In November of 2018, I lost my car. It got repossessed.      But before I get to that part, on of my most memorable moments that involved me and my car, was the day I came to a realization. The realization that I was addicted to Crystal Meth.      I was driving home from working a shift at On The Border, listening to a EDM dj that I just discovered a few weeks earlier... during my EDM music kick I was having because I was about to go to EDC Orlando. I don't remember if it was October or November that EDC Orlando was... but it was right before my car got repossessed because I do remember I had my car at the time of the festival. Because I paid 15 dollars to park in the grassy patch of a gas station... TWICE. Two days in a row.      Then, this song, that I never heard before, came on. It was "Take You Down", by ILLENIUM.  Instantly I started to cry when the lyrics "Sometimes I get so high, falling is the...

      Me calling out of work on a too regular of a basis started early on in my addiction. But I still needed money to get things and pay for things... you know, like drugs and rent. The necessities. So one high afternoon-evening, it's all a bit foggy the details like that. Sadly. But I digress. I was on the internet on my phone looking for supplemental income sources. I signed up for Postmates. This was at the early times of Postmates. It wasn't a everyday name. Where I lived in Orlando was the Westside of the City... just a mile or two away from Universal Studios. There wasn't much in business for me with Postmates out here.  I had to travel to the Eastside of the city. Near the University of Central Florida, to get any pings. Not to mention, I'd be sitting in parking lots for 30 minutes to a hour listening to music or Grinding (The verb meaning being on Grindr cruising) to occupy my time.      Since Postmates have proven to be basically be...

  Sebring Boy     Early into my more regular using of crystal meth, I met this boy that, I honestly, have forgotten his actual name. So I refer to him as "Sebring Boy" because something I do remember is that he moved to Orlando from North Dakota... but was originally from Sebring, Florida.     At this time of my early addiction, I had met a few people through the using of drugs already. But, Sebring Boy is the one who has stuck the most in my head in memories, as the first guy that meant something to me since breaking up with my now ex-boyfriend 6 months earlier.      As it goes for many a gay guys in the modern times, I met Sebring Boy through the app Grindr. This thin twink boy was so special in many ways... but what stood out in my memories, is that he wasn't a regular user of meth to the extent that I was. At this point of my addiction, I was what we refer to as "A Weekend Warrior" in the sense that I only really used during the weekends, aka,...

Part One: Early Addiction (Orlando, Florida. 2017-2018) 1. Introduction 2. So It Begins 3. Sebring Boy 4. HIV 5. Losing Car 6. Ex-Marine Roommate 7. Introduction to RingCentral 8. Becoming Homeless 9. Southern Nights 10. Work Part Two: Destination UNKNOWN (Orlando/Fort Lauderdale, Florida. 2018-2020) 11. Chalupa 12. KFC 13. JD 14. King XXL 15. Rock Bottom 16. The Butterfly Garden 17. Broward House Part Three: Destination STILL UNKNOWN (Fort Lauderdale, Florida/Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. 2020) 18. The 3 Brothers & Storage Wars 19. Mary 20. JD Round Two 21. US 1 and Sunrise 22. BJ 23. MGM 24. JD Round Three and A Deaf Elephant 25. Philly Streets Part Four: New York, NY (New York City. 2020-2223) 26. The Zoomerverse 27. ELITE & The Prime Cult 28. Homeless in NYC 29. More Zoom and Discord 30. The Litty Committee 31. HASA Apartment 32. Mental Health & Recovery

  Fast forward four months to January of 2017, when I was just fidgeting around on Grindr. I had a conversation with a man about only twenty-one years old that asked me, “Do you parTy?” I honest was in no position to deny I enjoyed to party. Being that I was a regular in the local Gay Bar scene of Orlando. But this man spelled party with a capital T. He explained to me that he was referring to asking me if I smoke Crystal Meth. I said I did not… but said for some reason, “I’m bot afraid to try that though”.     This young man then proceeded to invite me to his apartment to experiment with with at no cost. The way I looked at this, I was going to get a new friend and maybe even laid. Win/win in my book.     When I go over to his apartment which was right off of I-Drive, kind of close to where Sea World is located, he proceeded to pull out a medium sized Tupperware container full of this chunky iridescent white stuff, crystal meth. He loaded up his ...

  (The memoir of one man’s journey through addiction, adulthood, and annihilation) This entire story is one hundred percent the gods honest truth and the devil’s twisted tongue, manifested into words. My name is Zack. Zachery to be precise. But you can call me Zack. All my friends do. Well… they would, if I had friends that is. I’ve been living alone and isolated from the “Rea l World” for the last six years. So my friends list contains a handful of digital dudes and dames. All of which call me Zack, sometimes TTZ. But I’m jumping ahead of myself now. Let me start from the beginning. My memory isn’t quite what it used to be after crystallizing much of my brain cells with Tina (Crystal meth for those who are not aware of the lingo).      I haven’t always been a meth head. Before that, I was a sociologist. Went to college in the mountains of western North Carolina. Went to school while running one of the largest LGBTQ student organizations in   Appalachia ....